I whined and talked Hubband into starting the birthday bonanza early. Since he will be gone on my actual birthday (Did I mention it was Thursday? Uh-huh.) and I wanted to go to the gym tonight, I thought it would be nice to get it out of the way. There were CD's and DVD's and Peridot earrings followed by more than enough incredibly cheesey pizza followed by incredibly sweet ice cream.

So I decided to go with the idea of making this the lose it or forget it year.

Hubband's words were supportive, but his eyes held that exhausted look that said, "Here she goes again. I wonder how long this will last?" And I can't guarantee he's wrong. I'm just putting it out there as a challenge to myself. His one question: "How do you plan to accomplish this goal?", did give me pause. I should have a plan bigger than "Work out more and eat less". So I need to work on that.

I do, however, have all the tools I need. I have the gym membership and the home equipment as well. I have good shoes and hiking boots. I have books on nutrition and excercise. Can't even pretend I don't know what I'm doing. I even have the promise of cooler weather and kids back in school and time to myself.

It is funny, but Autumn has always felt like this time of renewal to me. The earth is in the process of shutting down but I'm in a phase of self-discovery and motivation and wonder at the beauty of the world around me. It must have something to do with it being back-to-school season. Or perhaps it's because it's my birthday and I'm beginning a new year. Either way, this is my time to shine.

Over dinner last evening, Hubband and I were discussing our ages. He had taken some quiz regarding when he would be able to retire and it came out that he could retire at 54. I'm not sure how. It could be that the quiz didn't consider his family, mortgage or son in college, but I digress. I pointed out that if he were to do that, I would be 47 when he retired. (He thought he should probably take up golf, then, so he'd have something to do while I worked!) Hubband said he was often amazed that he had a wife in her 30's because he felt so deeply intrenched in his 40's (with good reason, he's 46) and 30's seem so young to him.

From my point of view, I feel far too young to be looking at 40. I kind of attribute this in part to when I was born. I was born on the cusp of the Baby-Boomers and the Gen-Xers. I often fall into either category and relate well to both groups. I'm as comfortable in a room full of 20-somethings as a group of 40-somethings. I kind of hope I never catch up to my "age". I like that people look at me sideways when they try to guess how old I am.

Oops! Late now. Must get dressed and get out of here. Lunch with CWF's parents today. Whoopee!